This was recently asked on the message boards of a site I hang out on by a person who is super awesome and near and dear to my heart. I responded there, but I decided I’d post my response here as well since amazingly enough, after 2+ years I don’t have a single post on how to give a blowjob on this blog.
I’m queer, mostly dating genderqueer ‘girls’/bois/trans, etc, but I will date born-men, too. It’s just been less common. Since my last break up I’ve been on a man-bender, but oral sex is kinda personal…I haven’t been with that many dudes and it’s been years since I’ve given a blowjob on anything more than a dildo where it’s the same in many ways, but different.
So tips for giving head! I know you have ‘em. …no teeth is a given, I’m not daft 
Go!
Enthusiasm is key. You have to actually enjoy doing it and want to do it. That always makes things hotter. Take time to look him in the eye and moan while you’re sucking him off.
Start off a bit slow. Don’t go right into the sucking. Lick and stroke his cock, getting it nice and slippery.
Use both hands and your mouth. Get everything into the action! Stroke his cock with one (lubed or saliva’d) hand like you’re following the stripes on a barber pole, follow that hand with your mouth, and use the other one to play with his balls, perineum, and ass if he’s willing. While you’re doing this pay special attention to his frenulum, which is on the underside of the head of the penis. This is one of the most sensitive areas on most men.
To make it even more fun you can straddle his thigh while he lays on his back so that you can grind your cunt into his leg. Breasts brushing against body parts can also help. Really blow jobs are a whole body activity, but many women are only using their mouths.
Also, don’t worry about slobbering. The more slobber the better. And most men seem to enjoy the slurpy noises that go along with it.
Keep in mind that these instructions are a jumping off point. Ultimately the most important part of pleasing your partner is paying attention. You have to pay attention to the way they react to you and what you’re doing. Ask questions, experiment, and have fun. Everyone is different and that’s what makes sex interesting.
(This question was originally asked by a cis-female, but the answer can be adapted to other genders as well. Rub whatever body parts your partner finds to be sexy on their body. Um … not including your eyes … unless you’re both into that …)
Great article, thanks!!
Any chance of giving us poor guys (and maybe some girls) a heads up on how to return the favour? I love to go down on my wife, and she enjoys it but the more tips the better.
For instance – I heard about this way of giving her oral on her vulva but avoiding touching her clitoris until she is on the brink. Then go for the clitoris and she will cum really hard. But I don’t know the name or the actual technique.
Other ideas would be most welcome.
Good article! And from my perspective, dead on.
Just one point though – there is an impression/assumption out there that ALL men love blowjobs. It’s not true! But because of the popular perception it’s hard to convince women you don’t like them. I actually had to sit my my wife down and promise me to never go down on me again. She never breaks her promises so when I made her do that she realised I was serious. I was her first male partner (out of about a dozen or so) who didn’t like it.
I’m not the only one. One of my friends was telling me that he doesn’t like it either. I just wanted it out there that if your guy tells you that there’s no need to go down, or that he doesn’t like BJ’s, he simply doesn’t like them. It isn’t you and it isn’t the way you are doing it, so don’t labor the point by trying to perfect it.
Instead ask him what he does like.
Great point Phil. Everyone is different