Comments on: Analyzing Sexuality http://askgarnet.com/2010/02/10/analyzingsexuality/ Queer sex educator embarking on a new adventure with her wife and two cats. Sun, 06 May 2012 02:19:18 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: AskGarnet http://askgarnet.com/2010/02/10/analyzingsexuality/comment-page-1/#comment-177 AskGarnet Thu, 11 Feb 2010 00:19:38 +0000 http://askgarnet.com/?p=267#comment-177 Sometimes it is difficult to be the one who is focused on. It can be overwhelmingly self-conscious. Are you moaning enough? Do you smell okay? Will they notice that you forgot to trim your pubes? Should you be trying to touch them too? etc. etc. etc. Try to find ways to take the pressure off. I personally like to have my partner behind me when she's touching me because then I can't try to touch her too. It lets me just enjoy whats going on instead of over thinking things. Plus in our society we're taught that pleasure for the simple sake of pleasure is not okay. You're not just supposed to enjoy yourself. Maybe explore that idea a bit? Sometimes it is difficult to be the one who is focused on. It can be overwhelmingly self-conscious. Are you moaning enough? Do you smell okay? Will they notice that you forgot to trim your pubes? Should you be trying to touch them too? etc. etc. etc. Try to find ways to take the pressure off. I personally like to have my partner behind me when she’s touching me because then I can’t try to touch her too. It lets me just enjoy whats going on instead of over thinking things.

Plus in our society we’re taught that pleasure for the simple sake of pleasure is not okay. You’re not just supposed to enjoy yourself. Maybe explore that idea a bit?

]]> By: D http://askgarnet.com/2010/02/10/analyzingsexuality/comment-page-1/#comment-176 D Wed, 10 Feb 2010 21:52:42 +0000 http://askgarnet.com/?p=267#comment-176 HM! There is so much information out there it's difficult to sift through it all! I noticed there was a lack of consensus on the forums I found with the definition of Stone Butch. I suppose there are so many diverse and varying types of people out there, new terms need to be invented often, I suppose I may have to come up with some of my own! I think aversion is a poor choice of words. The reason I identified with the Stone Butch concept, is most of my mental and even nearly physical pleasure actually comes from providing the pleasure for my partner, I am a very distant second when it comes to priority. I think it has just morphed into it being much more one sided, where it's just an unfamiliar idea/desire to be focused on. Perhaps it is unhealthy... A lot of things to think about and explore! I agree more people need to do it, it's a little scary but also quite exciting! I highly recommend it :) And the tuckered out thing... A very good strategy! HM! There is so much information out there it’s difficult to sift through it all! I noticed there was a lack of consensus on the forums I found with the definition of Stone Butch. I suppose there are so many diverse and varying types of people out there, new terms need to be invented often, I suppose I may have to come up with some of my own!

I think aversion is a poor choice of words. The reason I identified with the Stone Butch concept, is most of my mental and even nearly physical pleasure actually comes from providing the pleasure for my partner, I am a very distant second when it comes to priority. I think it has just morphed into it being much more one sided, where it’s just an unfamiliar idea/desire to be focused on. Perhaps it is unhealthy…

A lot of things to think about and explore! I agree more people need to do it, it’s a little scary but also quite exciting! I highly recommend it :)

And the tuckered out thing… A very good strategy!

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