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Toys for the Honeymoon

Tomorrow evening the wife and I leave for our honeymoon. Now you may be asking yourselves, “What kinds of toys does a sex educator/sex toy reviewer bring with them on their honeymoon?” Because you know I have a ton of them, but only a couple make the cut. Some of them new and some of them old favorites that go on every trip. The above picture is what I’m pretty sure I’ve decided on bringing. From left to right starting in the top row they are:

Trojan Supras: The first non-latex condom I ever started using that have remained an old standby. Once these have run out though I will probably be switching to the polyisoprene because they are cheaper. The feeling of the condoms don’t really matter that much to me since they are just used on dildos, but they have to be non-latex as I am allergic.

Frank: He’s a cyberskin dildo that I love giving blowjobs to. I use honey dust to keep him lifelike instead of cornstarch so that he tastes yummy.

Durex Avanti: Again, just a condom I had lying around.

Hitachi Magic Wand: Like this one should be a surprise to anyone. Shouldn’t you all own one of these by now? Seriously? Its the best. Nuff said.

Mr. Bendy/Silky: My second favorite dildo ever. This guy is made out of squishy elastomer and has a rod in the center that allows for a bendy good time. I use condoms with him because elastomer is porous, but its totally worth it. This is definitely my favorite strap-on dildo.

Orbit: One of the first dildos I reviewed back when I was just a Carnal Consultant for Early to Bed. Still one of my faves! Although if I decide that I have too many dildos on the trip either Orbit or Frank will get cut.

Feeldoe Slim: High quality double-sided dildo that no romantic vacation can do without. Can be used with or without a harness.

Ella by Lelo: By far my absolute favorite dildo. And I know what I’m talking about; I own 14! This dildo is the absolute best for g-spot. Leave it to Lelo to only make one dildo, but have it be absolutely amazing.

Middle row:

Thigh Harness: This is a newer toy of mine that I’m trying out for Babeland. We’ve given it a few goes, but feel that in order to review it properly it needs to come with me on our honeymoon. Look for that review coming up soon.

Colore Moi Strawberry Body Paint: Yummy painting! Strawberries and champagne anyone?

Gun Oil: High quality silicone lubricant for some hot hot shower sex.

Maximus: My favorite lube. This stuff is waterbased and has the consistency of hair gel. I was finally smart enough to get a travel bottle that wouldn’t get all over everything too!

Saturn: This is a small ridged waterproof vibe made out of a silky plastic. Super cheap and hopefully fun in the shower. Never used this one before, but picked it up special for my honeymoon.

Dirty Dice: Yes, I said Dirty Dice. Honeymoons are supposed to be for silly sex games damnit! And I’ve never played with these before so I thought they’d be a fun way to get into the play.

Buddy: A silicone butt plug that is a little on the smaller side, but not too small.

Tweezer Clamps: Because with all this sweetness there needed to be some pain …

Silky Blindfold: Because sometimes its better if they can’t see whats coming. Mwahahaha!

Bottom row:

Flower Balm: Another product sent to me to review. I’ve played with it a little bit and I can tell you this: The menthol definitely works on clits and lips! Look for an upcoming review after the honeymoon!

Heart Paddle: I don’t know if anyone carries this anymore, but its a great lightweight wooden paddle that makes a great loud SMACK noise without hurting TOO much.

Vibrating Makeup Brush: No, I don’t care about being discreet. Discreet vibes will not get me off. However, the vibrating brush is great for sensation play.

Non-latex Gloves: We are monogamous and therefore are definitely fluid bonded. However, I work in an office and get lots of papercuts. The pH of the vag being what it is, gloves often make things less stingy for me. Also, the lower amount of friction helps with my arthritis.

Vibe Harness: OMG I looked at this thing today when I pulled it out and I think it may be time for a new one. This thing is OLD!! We’re talking, before this relationship old. But its my wife’s favorite. Its like a part of her by now.

Oh just realized that in the top row is my Teneo Uno you just can’t see it. Taking that too.

So there you have it! Should be a fun honeymoon. See you all next week.

Kegel Toys

So, I have heard time and again how important Kegels are for vaginal health. But I feel like there isn’t much information out there about which sex toys help with Kegels, especially when it comes to pregnancy. I am currently 29 weeks pregnant and am not high risk, so as far as I know there is no reason to avoid sex toys. While I know that you can strengthen Kegels without toys I would love to know what is on the market in various price ranges. Ideally a something that has more than just the propose of Kegels would be great. Do you have any ideas?

Yes, Kegels are super important! They are one of the best exercises anyone can do no matter what sexual equipment you were born with or have elected to have. For those of you who don’t know what Kegel exercises are or how to do them, they are a way to tone your pubococcygeus muscle (PC muscle). The PC muscle forms the pelvic floor and when strong can help prevent incontinence, make orgasms stronger, and can help men to delay ejaculation if they desire. The way to flex this muscle is by squeezing the way you would if you were trying to make yourself stop peeing midstream. In order to figure out how to do it you can stop yourself from peeing a few times, but I don’t recommend doing this regularly. The great thing about exercising your PC muscles is that you can do it anytime anywhere and no one will even know. You can do it at the grocery store, while talking to your boss, while pumping gas, while cleaning, etc. The possibilities are endless.

And you’re right, doing them during pregnancy is a great idea. Having strong PC muscles will help you to give birth more easily by making it easier to push and lessening your chances of tearing during labor. You should also do kegels after you give birth as this will help get everything back into shape faster.

While exercise equipment is not necessary to do kegels, it can make it more fun. Unfortunately there isn’t a whole lot of price range out there as you will need sex toys that are heavy and heavy materials tend to cost more money.

The cheapest option at about $28 would probably be Smart Balls. You insert one or both balls, leaving the string outside of your body like a tampon and you squeeze the balls with your PC muscles. For resistance you can pull on the string. While these can be fun, there is nothing orgasmic about them. Some people find them to be pleasurable, but there are other options out there that are more likely to get more of a rise out of you.

The other options I would suggest would be heavy dildos, often made out of stainless steel. These you can use during masturbation by inserting the dildo into your vagina and rhythmically squeezing your muscles around it towards orgasm. I highly recommend using a vibrator on your clit in conjunction with the weighted dildo. Here are some options of dildos that you can try, their weights, and their prices:
- Natural Contours Energie 1 lb $50
- Betty Dodson’s Vaginal Barbell just under 1 lb $76
- The Kegelcisor just under 1 lb $84
- njoy’s Fun Wand 12oz $88
- njoy’s Pure Wand 1.5 lbs currently on sale for $91.80
- or if you’re really hardcore there is njoy’s eleven weighing in at 2.75 lbs and costing $300

These toys are all made of high quality materials so consider it to be an investment that will last a really long time. And while you can easily warm these stainless steel toys with warm water before hand, Betty Dodson (one of my heroes and the queen of masturbation and female orgasms) suggests starting with the dildo cold so that your muscles will automatically start to clamp around it. Also, be sure to use lube when using these or any dildos. All of these toys, with the exception of the Smart Balls, can be used with either water or silicone based lubes.

Ella by Lelo

Lelo is a sex toy company that everyone should know about. They make high end sex toys that are just plain fantastic. They have mostly made and sold vibrators that are made of high quality materials, are rechargeable, and come with an unheard of one year warranty. Many of their toys are highly innovative, like the Mia which charges via a USB port. Not only all that, but they’re also a Swedish company and if you know me, you know I have a longing for Sweden in my heart and quite possibly my loins. But what bleeding heart liberal doesn’t dream of living in Stockholm?

Anyhoo … When I found out I might have a chance to test out a Lelo of my very own I became downright giddy. At this point I think I can be called a collector of sex toys. I own LOTS. And now it is about filling in the parts that I do not yet have. This includes types, materials, and brands. I need to have sex toys from all the top sex toy companies: Fun Factory (check), Tantus (check), Vixen Creations (check many times over), Vibratex (check), Lelo (new check), nJoy (sadly no check), Jimmy Jane (sadly no check).

Now I could’ve gone the traditional route and gone with a Lelo vibe. They have a lot to offer, but I am a Hitachi loyalist so while I do still get new vibes, I wanted my Lelo experience to be as exciting for me as possible. Luckily for me, Lelo recently released their first dildo, Ella. Until a couple years ago I actually only owned one dildo and I can’t believe it took me so long to become a dildo enthusiast.

Ella is number 13 in my collection and she gave me even more reason for enthusiasm. I didn’t think it was possible, but Ella has actually topped the list. She is my new favorite dildo. Ella is practically perfect.

Lelo calls Ella “a dedicated pleasure object” and I would have to agree. If you love g-spot stimulation like I do, you’ll love Ella. While most g-spot toys simply bend in one direction so that you get a bit of g-spot stimulation as that one small spot goes back and forth over the sensitive area, the Ella has a whole flat surface that curves upwards so that that same spot is stimulated almost constantly. The result is pure heaven and quite possibly some ejaculation as well.

But maybe you’re not ready for some g-spot stimulation yet and you want to warm up with the old in and out first. Ella has that covered as well! You can use either side of her so you can use one side for times when you want dedicated g-spot stimulation and the other side for when you want penetration without so much dedication to just one spot. The one downside to a double sided dildo like this is that it is not harness compatible. Like I said before, “practically perfect.” But she is absolutely great for masturbation and partner play.

Now while Ella is perfect for me, I have to remind you that all women are made differently. Size queens will most likely not like this dildo. It is particularly small. Even I found it to be a bit lacking at times when wanting to flex my PC muscles around something when on the g-spot side.

Now down to the nitty gritty:
Ella is made of silicone which means she is non-porous and body safe. Normally I would recommend boiling your silcone dildos, but the instructions that came with Ella warned against exposing her to extreme temperatures. And well, I’m not exactly open to the possibility of ruining my new favorite dildo just so I can tell you whether or not she is safe to boil. So just use soap and water.

Ella is great for vaginal play, but I would not recommend her for anal play as she does not come equipped with a flared base.

Lelo offers a one year warranty on all of its toys and while that is fantastic on vibrators that have mechanical parts, it isn’t such a great deal on silicone dildos. Silicone is a material that should last a lifetime and companies like Vixen Creations actually give you a lifetime warranty. The one year warranty just doesn’t do a silicone dildo justice. Oh well. Hopefully it will never become an issue.

But even if it does become an issue, Ella is actually the cheapest Lelo product currently on the market at $44. What a steal! For a company that makes luxury vibes that range in price from $64 to $1500, I was actually really surprised that their first dildo was so cheap.

In other news, I bought a new computer recently so updates should happen more regularly now. Thanks for your patience.

Romantic Weekend Away

I’m going out of town this weekend to celebrate my anniversary with my wonderful fiance so no updates from me this weekend. I have been banned from using the internet except to check the weather and find good local restaurants. I’m sure we’ll have a great time.

Some good news: I found out that I was wrong about those Babeland sale dates. Vixen Creations Dildos are 20% off through the rest of July! That’s a good deal. Vixen Creations makes some of the highest quality silicone dildos. I recently picked up Raquel and I can’t wait to try her on vacation! I bought some other goodies as well, which you may be hearing about in the future.

I hope you all have a fantastic weekend! I know I will!

Fisting

First off, I want to thank dep for the wonderful new site design. He did a great job and I hope you all enjoy it. I’ve also added a whole bunch of new recommendations along the side as well as a best of. Check them out and let me know if you think any other entries should be put in the best of section.

Secondly, in case you haven’t noticed, you can now reach my website simply by going to askgarnet.com. There is no longer a need to type in the blogspot part. It will redirect you. Eventually I may move everything over to the new URL.

And now on to a new question.

What’s a good way to introduce fisting? How do you start? What’s the best lube to use? Any techniques that are good for the novice?

Fisting is not something to be entered into lightly (no pun intended). Both parties should really think about how comfortable they are with an entire hand inside of themselves or the other person as well as whether or not they think it is actually possible. Some people just can’t get that much inside no matter how much they’re warmed up first. And some people are just fine until they look down and see just how much is inside of them and start to freak out.

Things you will absolutely need in order to fist or be fisted:

1. Trust – You absolutely have to be able to trust each other because this is a sexual act that can really surprise you and possibly really hurt you. I’ve heard a lot of people say that they are amazed at the amount of emotion that fisting brings out in them. And lets face it, there’s also the possibility of physical damage as well if precautions aren’t made and if things go too fast.

2. Communication – As with any sexual exchange communication is extremely important. But when you start entering into sexual acts that can really take a lot of patience and understanding between partners communication becomes all that much more important. If you can’t discuss what feels good with each other you definitely should not try fisting.

3. Warming up – Lets face it, a fist is a lot to take for anyone. So warm up! If you’re fisting a vagina then you can easily just use fingers. Start with one or two fingers and then add one a little at a time when she is ready. Dildos can also be used. If you are warming up an ass to be fisted I highly recommend using butt plugs to warm it up. A lot of in and out motions will wear the ass out and you’ll never get that fist in there. Instead use butt plugs of varying sizes to warm up. You can start off with something small like Little Flirt and work your way up to something like the Severin with several sizes in between.

4. Lube – Lots and lots of thick lube. I suggest something like Maximus which has a very thick consistency and lasts a good long time.

5. Gloves – Either latex or nitrile gloves depending on what you prefer and if either of you have a latex allergy. These are a great way to make your sex safer especially when stressing body parts out when fisting. They are absolutely necessary if you will be fisting an ass and will make the experience more comfortable for both of you.

Something to also keep in mind about fisting is that it might not happen the first time you try. Be patient and try not to be disappointed. It is something you should really work up to and allow a lot of time for. And if you or your partner start to feel uncomfortable, stop. You can always try again later if you want to.

And once again: communication, communication, communication. Start communicating before your clothes ever come off. Talk about your expectations and your fears. Communicate during. Talk about what feels good, what doesn’t, your emotions. Communicate afterward. Talk about what worked and what didn’t, what you learned for next time, and if there will even be a next time.

Babeland Sale!

Just wanted to give you all a heads up on the sale going on over at Babeland right now. They have Vixen Dildos and several other items on sale at 20% off. That’s a steal! Click here for the goods. Sale goes through the 11th.

Toys for the Honeymoon

Kegel Toys

Ella by Lelo

Romantic Weekend Away

Fisting

Babeland Sale!

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