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Q: I hate the idea of supporting unethical porn. Do you know of any ethical porn sites that are not too expensive or that charge by the day? I usually only watch porn once a month, so I do not want to pay too much. I especially like gay (male) bondage porn. Any recommendations would be great!
A: I love that you’re on board with supporting ethical porn. It’s so nice to see people who are really interested in making a difference using their dollars to vote for what they want and don’t want in the world.
There aren’t a whole lot of porn sites that are really inexpensive or only charge by the day. However, what you may be interested in doing is either joining up for a month and taking a day or two to just go through all of their content and copy to your computer what you think you’ll need for the next several months. Obviously you should do this in an ethical way so don’t use special software to grab content and don’t share the content you grab with other people. It should be for your own personal use. Another option is to do video on demand (VOD) so that you only pay for what you watch.
I’m not too familiar with gay male bondage porn so I asked around for some advice from sex workers and companies I trust. First I asked VOD site HotMoviesForHer because they’re just awesome and they suggested Muscle Bound Productions. I can’t speak to the ethical nature of Muscle Bound Productions, but Hot Movies is pretty awesome. New users get 10 free minutes and then you just pay for what you watch when you want to watch. There’s no signup fees or anything.
Jiz Lee suggested Titan Men which has a few different options for signing up including VOD. Then there’s also Kink.com which houses more porn than anyone could ever possibly watch. Check out their Kink Men Gay Shoots on VOD. But like I said, they have a ton of porn so just look around at their different websites to see what appeals to you.
Also, check out Heavenly Spire which is one of Shine Louise Houston’s creations. She’s awesome and was the subject of one of my recent Ethical Pornographer interviews.
I could probably write an entire blog post just about why this song reminds me of Dylan, but I don’t want to do that because I don’t actually know her as a person. But basically, in my mind she’s a strong woman who deserves a lot of respect and what I gathered from Fluid: Women Redefining Sexuality is that she likes to reclaim words. She has reclaimed ho and I could totally see her reclaiming “sexy bitch” and giving it an awesome positive attitude.
Anyhoo, here’s a snippet from the interview:
I do enjoy performing with a wide variety of people and that I do is completely intentional. As a person, I feel a lot of pride about being queer identified and feel it important that the understandings of what queer is be more broad. I resist being pigeonholed in general but also want to represent a more fluid sexuality that feels available to all people. I guess I strive for it and it comes naturally, I just enjoy sex and want to promote a sexuality that is open and accessible. Lately I have been getting to choose who I work with, especially in doing boy/girl porn. It’s fun to be able to choose because as I mentioned earlier, I know who is professional and has a reputation for shooting great scenes and being pleasant to work with. I also have people in the business that I admire and want to work with at some point so getting to choose those people is always great. I am also flexible and enjoy working with people who are booked, which is how it happens most often. Again, I have been very lucky that I have really enjoyed a lot of the people I have shot with, that’s the benefit of working with companies you love, they hire great people and you make new acquaintances that way.
Topco has released a new line of sex toys that is meant to appeal to those with more disturbing paraphilias. The line is called the “Fucked Line” and features such toys as a vomiting mouth stroker, bleeding pussy stroker, and a dildo that looks like it has been infected with an STI. The idea is to appeal to fetishists who may not be able to safely act out their fantasies by catering to their often dangerous desires.
I’m extremely intrigued by this and not totally sure how I feel about it. I mean at what point does it help to keep these people safe and at what point does it actually increase the likelihood of them acting these things out in real life? At what point does it become so objectionable that the products are actually illegal to sell? For example, I can’t imagine that it would be legal to sell a child stroker for pedophiles.
Stagliano was charged with obscenity and was facing up to 32 years in prison and $7 million in fines. Many compared this to the sentence handed to Oscar Grant’s murderer who received just 14 years in jail for a crime witnessed around the world .
The obscenity in question featured 3 movies which had such apparently depraved things as female ejaculation (I’ve seen urination cited as one of the violations and I wonder if this is what they are referring to or if there is also urination), milk enemas, ass sex, foot fetish, BDSM, and puppy play. All of the players in the movies were consenting adults. All of the people who would be viewing the movies would also be consenting adults as long as there was no coercion by outside sources having nothing to do with the films themselves or Stagliano. How exactly is this worse than shooting someone? Even if the content of the videos is not something that turns you on, why should it be charged as obscene and the creator thrown in jail with hefty fines? The same could happen for the creator of something that does turn you on. It’s a slippery slope.
Thankfully Stagliano has been let go. But I must worry for other such pornographers who push the envelope. The envelope that is sometimes not even all that far outside of the norm. For example, did you know that fisting is considered to be obscene and distributors will not let it appear in DVD format? Fisting is an incredibly common act in the queer community and something that ends up getting cut from a lot of films where queer actors are told to have the kind of sex that they love to have. And is female ejaculation really pushing the envelope? Many women do it. It’s not even something that a lot of women do by choice. It is a natural reaction to their orgasms. How exactly is that any more obscene then men ejaculating?
I do hope that this sets some sort of precedent, but I worry that it won’t because the case was thrown out for insufficient evidence. Had Stagliano been judged not guilty then the precedent could have been set and it would have been more difficult to convict pornographers after this. Although I am curious how much evidence is needed when prosecutors had an entire video catalogue to choose from.
Obscenity laws are supposedly meant to protect people, but I have to wonder who they think they are protecting. If anything, the adult industry needs to stop being shamed all the time and there needs to be more of a focus on enhancing the working environments for sex workers. But that’s another argument for another day, one I’m always making.
Speaking of ethics, I just posted my newest installment in my column Ethical Pornographer. In this one I interview Scott Owens of EroticBPM. The truth is we’re buddies. We’ve known each other a long time, but he’s also someone I look up to a lot. He’s also the person that I’m currently exploring starting an ethical certification for adult products and services with. He’s pretty rad and you should read about him!
Here’s a snippet:
GJ: You’ve boasted before that feminists like your website. How, as a man, do you feel that helps or hurts your business model and why do you think they say they like your website?
SO: Early on, this was a really interesting thing for me. It felt really good to come into an industry that many at the time viewed as purely exploitive of women and then really get a sort of stamp of approval from not just women but feminists.
I think the way that I worked with women and gave them the freedom to express themselves how they want without pressure or incentive, it connected with a lot of people.
Unfortunately, it became a sort of marketing gimmick for a lot of sites to appear feminist by appearing to or actually being run by women. I didn’t jump on with that and it probably hurt me a bit. For a while I got quite a bit of email from people who said they could not support me or work with me because I was a man. Some people believe that a man in porn can not be feminist and will always inherently be exploitative of women. I disagree, but with so many different schools of thought on feminism it’s not something I care to debate with people.
Today it is less of an issue, I don’t give much thought to it or hear much about it because I don’t define or promote my business that way. Though, nothing has changed, I still have the same ethics that brought me the attention in the first place.