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I was recently contacted by Undercover Condoms because they wanted to let you know that they are a great place to buy safer sex supplies online. They asked me to review their website which I do not do for free. I review products for free because I receive the product for my time and effort. For website reviews I do require compensation for the amount of time I put into it. However, my opinions are genuine and cannot be bought.
I asked twitter and facebook followers what was important to them in an online safer sex store. The responses mostly included free or reasonable shipping costs, wide selection (something they wouldn’t be able to get at the drugstore), discreet shipping, easy to navigate site, and customer reviews. I’ve combined that with my own ideas on what makes a safer sex supplier website great to come up with this review.
Disappointingly, not many people showed up to the twitter porn party a few nights ago. We still had fun, but hopefully next month we can get more folks to join in because the conversation makes it better.
I’m not going to review the movie we watched, but I did take a lot of screen caps to share so you can all get a taste of it. It was panty dropping hot and really well shot. But you all should seriously attend the next one.
(Hover over picture and click on arrows to scroll through. Click on middle icon to enlarge.)
Hot, right? Well let me tell you, I couldn’t even begin to capture the chemistry between the players or the really really hot scenes – too much movement to take pics of.
If you’d like to check out the commentary from that night go to #pornparty. If you’d like to watch Tight Places: A Drop of Color you can buy the DVD or watch it streaming via VOD at Good Vibes. I highly recommend it.
Q: My husband went to Walgreens to pick up some condoms. He said he saw VCF there, which he hasn’t seen in a long time. I went to the website because I’ve actually never heard of this film. Nowhere did it have it’s efficacy against pregnancy. It did however say “no birth control is 100% accurate” lol. We’re married and fine if it happens that I get pregnant..and it seems it might be better since we don’t have to stop to put on a condom. Thoughts?
A: For those who do not know, VCF is Vaginal Contraceptive Film. It is a small, thin, transluscent square that a woman inserts inside of her vagina. After about 15 minutes the sheet melts and coats the cervix with spermicide. It’s kind of like those mint strips you put in your mouth to freshen your breath, but for your vag to keep you from getting pregnant. It is not effective against STIs, and may actually increase your risk, which I will get into later.
The efficacy rates for pregnancy prevention are about 74% for normal use, 94% for perfect use. When paired with condoms the efficacy rate gets up to about 97%. When I say normal use vs. perfect use what I mean is that people screw shit up and don’t always do it right. In general, the more often you use something the better you get at it. So that 74% tends to be for the first year that you use a new method and your efficacy goes up from there. When I say 94% for perfect use that means how effective it is if you use it the correct way every time
You say that it sounds like it might be better because you won’t have to stop to put on a condom. However, you still have to stop to put in the VCF and then wait 15 minutes to make sure it is effective. So unless you plan ahead you will still be stopping and possibly stopping and waiting. And you may not want to plan ahead in this case unless you’re absolutely positive that you’ll be having sex later and this is why …
Nonoxynol-9
VCF is made from Nonoxynol-9 which is a spermicide. It is a very effective spermicide as it immobilizes sperm on contact. However, in such a delicate ecosystem as the vagina you might imagine that there could be some issues. If you use Nonoxynol-9 sparingly there shouldn’t be much of an issue if you’re in a monogamous disease-free relationship unless you are prone to infection. However, the more often you use it the more your vagina is exposed to this harsh chemical. And the more it is exposed to it the more likely you are to actually get vaginal lesions. For people who are not in monogamous disease-free relationships, this means an increased likelihood of contracting an STI especially HIV and HPV.
Like I said, it’s relatively safe if you’re not using it often, which is why you shouldn’t use it unless you are 99.9% sure that you’re about to get it on.
But there’s also the issue of oral sex. Say you and your partner have been having a grand old time fucking away and you just feel this need to have his cock in your mouth. Well now his cock is probably covered in spermicide and will taste not so good and will quite possibly numb your mouth a bit. Or maybe he’s been finger fucking you and rubbing your clit and then he just has to taste you … same thing. Genitals don’t taste so good with nonoxynol-9 all over them and they’ll also make your lips go numb and possibly your tongue.
This is precisely why I said 15 minutes of waiting. Sure you can makeout and feel each other up, but finger fucking and oral sex may make things less pleasant.
Conclusion
So VCF is decent at preventing pregnancy, especially when combined with other birth control methods, but it should be used sparingly and you may not want to put your mouths anywhere near anything that’s been put in your vagina. It’s a great options for some, and not so great for others.
Here is a how-to video provided from the makers of a VCF:
I was recently asked to weigh in on a debate happening on the message boards I hang out on. I’m the resident sexpert so there are times when I am definitely in need. The topic was Ass to Mouth (ATM) which specifically means when a guy fucks someone in the ass and then that person gives him a blowjob. They were specifically talking about seeing it in porn. I’ve never seen it in porn myself, but I think that’s because I tend to watch feminist/indie/queer porn.
This is what I wrote:
First of all, no one’s dick should be going in anyone’s ass without a condom. Even if you are both disease free and monogamous the guy can get some pretty nasty infections from barebacking. We’re talking urinary, bladder, and kidney infections here. So always wear a condom for ass sex please.
And if you’re wearing a condom for ass sex then ATM should never make a difference because you can just pull the condom off or switch condoms to blow him. Simple as pie.
If for some reason you decide to not follow my earlier advice and decide that a burning feeling while you piss might be a fun thing to try, then I would highly recommend that you do not stick your dick in anyone’s mouth after it’s been in an ass. You can get e-coli or hepatitis. Hell you can just get e-coli from rimming so what do you think it’s like if you’re basically licking 6 inches inside of someone’s ass?
Please have more respect for your sexual partners as well as sex workers. Sex workers are people too and the more you promote their safety (ie no ATM, safer sex practices, autonomy, etc.) the longer they’ll work and the happier they’ll be. I personally think it’s way hotter to watch pornstars who like fucking and enjoy every second of it instead of ones who are coerced into practices that are unsafe.
I understand that accidents happen and sometimes you’re in the moment and forget what you’re doing. But once you realize it, please stop and go wash up real quick before you keep going. It’s better to be happy, healthy, and safe.
One of the main arguments I often hear against porn performers practicing safer sex is that porn is supposed to be a fantasy and condoms ruin that fantasy. Can you see why this might be a bit of an issue in getting people to protect themselves against unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections (STIs)?
I mean not only are the porn performers themselves being put at risk for contracting STIs, but this notion is helping to perpetuate the idea that really sexy sex is unprotected. The same goes for erotica, romance novels, romantic comedies, sitcoms, etc. Out culture has created a narrative in which sex only feels good and looks sexy if no one is protected. We’re all suffering from this narrative, but sex workers are probably suffering the most.
I understand that in your fantasy world you won’t want to think about pregnancy or diseases. I get that, I really do. However, wouldn’t it be more beneficial to just think of safer sex items as sexy in themselves? Why does a condom or a glove have to make you think about HIV or HPV? Why can’t it be just like another sex toy? Or just something that is equated with sex. Why don’t we see unprotected sex and think these things? Wouldn’t that be a bit more accurate anyway? A condom, a dental dam, or a glove could all easily help us focus on the action because we know we don’t have to worry about the health of our fantasy players. They are a-ok and going to have super hot sex with absolutely nothing to worry about. Where as if we don’t see those things we instead worry for our sexy idols and that worry gets in the way of our ability to become aroused and get off. What would that do for the rates of unwanted pregnancies and STIs in general and for the health of sex workers specifically?
And why do safer sex supplies get such a bad wrap anyway? I’ve had people scrunch up their nose and say, “but that’s not exactly sexy” when I talk about using gloves (in butts no less – where poop is! Because poop on your bare hand is definitely way sexier than gloves). How are gloves not sexy? They can help to transform your hand into a sex toy.
As a paper pusher I always have paper cuts on my hands. And you know what can be really distracting from sexy time? Acidic vaginal juices stinging the hell out of those cuts. Or maybe you have a hangnail or a nail that chipped too close to the skin and you don’t want to cut it off just yet. Gloves! Or maybe you have calluses on your hands and your partner just enjoys a smoother, less frictiony ride. And you don’t have to wear those white gloves that your doctor wears – unless you have a medical fetish and that gets you all kinds of hot – there are other colors. There are black, blue (non latex), and purple (non-latex). Ooh I even found red! Although, they’re vinyl so they won’t fit quite so well.
And then there are condoms. There are so many fancy ones on the market these days that can turn a cock into a sex toy. You can have a studded cock without ever having to go to a piercer, or maybe you want studs AND ribs, you can have super thin condoms that keep you protected but make it feel like you’re wearing a little less, you can make your cock glow in the dark and play hide the radioactive tube, condoms that provide more head room, speaking of head room here’s one that has a whole twist, ones that transfer heat (non latex) really well, maybe you just want your dick to taste really good but also be vegan. Or you could just have one of everything and try them all. So many options!
Then there’s always the argument that you have to stop the action to get the safer sex supplies and put them on/put them to work. I call bullshit. First of all, if you’re planning on playing you should have them within reach. Secondly, make it part of the fun, part of the anticipation. If my wife can get up to go wash a dildo in the middle of us having sex you can take the time to put on a glove or a condom. And that’s just part of the fun. Putting it on means that it’s go time. Plus, if it’s a condom, it can always be put on with your partner’s mouth.
Hi !
I never had a girlfriend and have sex. And it is really hard for me. Could you, plz, advice me how I can put the condom in that it will last good in the intercourse? Also, I would like to know can the vagina be so tight or so dry the condom can fell out from the penis ? I am 24 yrs old and never had sex with anyone. It is hard. I masturbate every day and I would like to find a good looking lady like you. When I had an opportunity for sex, should I do it ? Can you give a advice for a good artificial vagina for masturbation ?
Whoa whoa whoa. That is a lot of questions right there. It will take me a few blog posts to answer all of these so stay tuned for all of the answers over the next few days.
First, let’s talk about condoms. Putting a condom on correctly is really important so here’s how you do it:
Check the expiration date printed on the condom to make sure it is still good. If it is not, throw it out and get a new one. If it’s good, move on to step 2.
Carefully tear the condom wrapper open. Do NOT use scissors or anything sharp as you could make a hole in the condom.
Unroll the condom a little bit to figure out which way it goes.
Squeeze a drop or two of a water or silicone based lube into the condom. This will make it more pleasurable for the wearer.
Squeeze the first 1/4-1/2 inch of the condom to make sure there is room for semen to go when you ejaculate.
If you have foreskin, pull it down gently so that it is under the head of your penis and then roll the condom down the shaft of the penis.
Rub some water or silicone lube on the outside of the condom.
Stick in hole and thrust in and out.
After you ejaculate pull out immediately before your dick gets soft. Make sure you hold onto the base of the condom as you pull out.
Then just throw away. If you want to have sex again use a new condom.
Here’s a demo video I made because sometimes it’s just easier to show than tell.
Many condoms come prelubed, but adding a little extra lube can never hurt and in fact will often make sex more pleasurable for both partners. It will also keep the sex safer since the condom will be less likely to dry out and break. Latex can actually dry a woman’s natural lubrication out.
Condoms can fall off. It isn’t usually because the vagina is too tight though. It may happen if it dries out, but it can also happen just from the friction of thrusting or if the condom is too big. Guys, don’t pretend your cock is bigger than it is because condoms that are too big are more likely to break and/or slip off. Get a condom that fits. If you are worried about slippage I suggest using a cheap cock ring around the base of the condom to keep it on.
I was recently contacted by Undercover Condoms because they wanted to let you know that they are a great place to buy safer sex supplies online. They asked me to review their website which I do not do for free. I review products for free because I receive the product for my time and effort. For website reviews I do require compensation for the amount of time I put into it. However, my opinions are genuine and cannot be bought.
